I was watching an acquaintance’s wedding video this morning. A wave of emotion washed over me when I saw one of the groomsmen getting ready. I recognized him from the chin down shot immediately. I hadn’t seen or spoken to him in more than four years, but here I was, feeling all sorts of unresolved emotions. When I decided to no longer be friends with George*, it left an incredible hole in my heart and life. But I knew it was best for us both. And though we are no longer friends, he was my catalyst towards emotional health.
A catalyst is defined as “an agent that provokes or speeds significant change or action.” George pushed me into looking deeply at myself and deciding to get better. Catalysts are meant to provoke you to change or action and they help you develop an attitude of change because they are often emotionally charged agents. Even as I was writing this blog, I was overcome with emotion about how important George was to me becoming fearlessly fulfilled. That is a catalyst’s role!
Catalysts do three things to help you develop an attitude of change:
- Catalysts show you something you want but don’t really have. For me, I wanted a real relationship—with George, with my family and other friends, with anyone. I wanted to know how to truly love others instead of being judgmental and self-righteous. I wanted to know myself and love myself so that I could love others more deeply. My failed friendship with George brought these things into the forefront in my life.
- Catalysts show you something you have but don’t really want. I had real issues with emotional health. I was constantly jealous, angry, and controlling in all of my relationships. As I’ve said before, I thought that people were objects to be used for my pleasure instead of gifts from God to treasure. I didn’t want to be that way, but I was because it was the only way I knew to be. If not for my catalyst, I might still be that person today.
- Catalysts help bring you to the end of yourself. We don’t get to the end of ourselves all alone; something usually pushes us there. For me, it was losing my friendship with George permanently. Even now, God has not allowed me to reconnect with him—even though we live in the same county and have some of the same friends—for reasons I may not know until heaven. And today while writing this, I realize that I miss him terribly. However, what I DO know is that if George would have held on to me back then, I may not have taken that required step into Celebrate Recovery and grown as exponentially as I did. It was at the end of myself that I found God, health, and my true worth. It was at the end of myself that God healed my broken heart and bound up my wounds (Psalm 147:3).
True, lasting change is always accompanied by a catalyst. I feel I owe George a huge thank you for the true, lasting change he inspired me to find. And maybe one day I can share that with him face to face. In the meantime, I’m still a work in progress who will continue to thank God for providing me with the perfect catalyst to propel me towards health and wealth in Him.
Have you found a catalyst to propel you towards becoming fearlessly fulfilled? Share with me in the comments or visit my Contact Me page for a free 30-minute Identity Intensive!